You have almost certainly found yourself in a situation in which you felt yourself getting more and more frustrated. Maybe you were working on a new task, and you just could not seem to figure out how to do it. Maybe you were having a disagreement, and you just could not see how the other person could oppose your position. Maybe you just want to concentrate or rest, but you keep getting interrupted.
Those are just a few of the huge number of things that can lead to feelings of frustration. In fact, you can even feel frustrated without being able to identify exactly why. And if you are a person who has gone through treatment for a substance use disorder, those feelings of frustration can start to chip away at the foundations of your recovery.
Why would frustrations put your recovery at risk? Well, we know that high levels of stress can get you started on a path to relapse, and frustration is definitely a kind of stress. That means it is important to have some strategies in place for those moments when you feel frustration coming on.
Let’s take a look at each of the three situations we noted above—a new task, a disagreement, a set of ongoing interruptions—and see how you might deal with each. Spoiler alert: You might deal with each in the same general way—by stepping away from whatever is causing the frustration.
New Task Frustration
Learning a new task can easily lead to feelings of frustration. After all, when you learn to do something you have not done before, there are going to be challenges along the way. And if you are not by nature a patient individual, those challenges can add up to trouble in a hurry.
Often when these sorts of frustrations arise, it is tempting to just keep trying to accomplish your goal—even when you are not making any progress at all. Not powering through can feel like giving up. But the reality is that you are far less likely to manage to work your way through a complex process if you just let your frustrations rise and rise.
So what to do? The move just might be to step away from the task so that you can reset. Rather than getting more and more annoyed and letting your stress level rise and rise, you will be better served by taking a break.
It might also be a good moment to ask for help. Do you know someone who already knows how to do what you are trying to do? Do you know someone who is willing to learn alongside you and keep the mood a little lighter than you have been able to on your own? Either way, leaning into (or building) a connection with someone else is a good idea—in general and for your recovery efforts.
Disagreement Frustration
Disagreements pop up in all kinds of relationships—at home, at work, among friends, and more. When they do, they can be very frustrating—especially when you are convinced you are right and the other person is wrong. Whether the topic at hand is high stakes or low stakes, sometimes folks—perhaps you yourself—have a tendency to dig in when they think they are in the right.
When you feel your temper getting the best of you, it is probably time to call for a break. You need to calm down—and the other person might need to, too. It can be a useful practice—once you have cooled off—to really think about the other person’s argument and to try to identify potential compromises. Coming back to the conversation with kindness rather than ire is good for both parties. It also better supports your recovery.
Concentration Frustration
When you are really trying to get into the groove on a task, repeated interruptions can be truly aggravating. Sometimes, it can seem like everyone needs everything from you right this very minute. That can really start to bump up your stress levels and sense of frustration.
One way to address this problem is to set clear boundaries. Building focus time into your schedule—when you turn off the alerts on your phone and your computer and shut your door—is one good way to protect some time for deep concentration.
This advice applies to times when you need to rest, too. Schedule time for your hobbies. Dedicate time to spend with friends and family. When you are on vacation, be on vacation. Build a sleep routine that works for you.
Being intentional about your time is a great way to firm up the foundations of your recovery.
Substance Use Disorders Are Frustrating to Say the Least
Located in Williamsburg, Virginia, The Farley Center helps individuals who are struggling with a substance use disorder. We can also address co-occurring mental health disorders that might be entangled with a person’s struggles with drugs or alcohol.
Few things are more frustrating than the ways in which substance use can upend every aspect of your life—and few things are more satisfying than reclaiming your life so you can build a better future. When you are ready to get started, we are here to help.
